Rising Zu
by Matt's-Awesome-Too
Summary: It's a story about a samurai Pikachu, a ninja Murkrow, and a Vampire Jigglypuff being chased by a Houndoom bounty hunter. Isn't that enough to read? I like pie! Meeps! New Chapter up!
1. Chapter 1

Matt here: THIS IS NOT PART OF MY "IF I WERE..." SERIES! It's an idea I've had since my If I were a demon story. So enjoy.

* * *

Disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon, and this isn't like my "If I were..." series, note how it's in action.

Hot of 180 Old Order/ Summer of -1.9999 Freedom Era

It was a sunny day, there wasn't a breeze to be found, and it was quite. That wouldn't last long. The armies were growing closer. The Rebellion and the Fighting Dojo were about to decide the outcome of the pokemon world. The Rebellion had been fighting for 3 years under the belief that all types if pokemon could live together, while the Fighting Dojo was part of the organized villages that kept pokemon in order. The Rebellion was confident. Maybe too confident.

Rebel Leader, a Houndoom: We will have to fight our hardest to win!

Rebel Soldier, a Jumpluff: We have the fucking pussies in our sights! They won't know what fucking hit them! We fucking rock!

Rebel Leader, laughing: I'm supposed to say that your wrong, but who am I kidding, we do fucking rock!

All of the rebel forces cheered in unison, over there "guaranteed" victory, except for a pikachu holding his katana sitting away from the group, wishing for the war to be over. A Murkrow walked up and sat beside him.

Murkrow: Why so sad, Zu? We're gonna win this thing! We'll finally be free!

Zu, the Pikachu: ... Shadow, my old friend, I do not wish to battle. I just want to go home.

Shadow, the Murkrow: That's just it! If we win, we go home, free as a bird!

Zu: Your already a bird.

Shadow: Wise guy, eh?

Zu, chuckling: You always know how to lift my spirits. I'll fight this one last time.

Shadow: You gonna come back to the party?

Zu: No, I fight best sober, like most pokemon do!

Shadow, leaving: Good thing I'm not most pokemon.

Zu faked a smile until Shadow was gone, then he went back to sadness.

Hot of 180 Old Order/ Summer of 0 Freedom Era

It was the stroke of midnight, the Rebellion had decided on a full out storm of the Fighting Dojo base. This was the night it would all end. The Rebellion was at the foot of Champion's Hill, the were taking a short break to plan for the attack.

Rebel Leader: You all have the plan?

Rebel Soldier, an Ekans: Yeah, yeah, me and the other poison types sneak in and poison as many as we can, then, when the others notice we sound the alarm for the rest of you guys to pick them off.

Rebel Leader: And you Zu?

Zu: I stay behind and...

Zu ear twitched to the sound of a branch snapping then a rustle of leaves.

Zu: That's weird.

Rebel Leader: What?

Zu: There was no wind,... EVERYONE RUN! IT'S A TRAP!

Zu's words never reached his comrades, as a wave of Hitmonchan and Hitmonlee fell from the trees.

Rebel Leader: Atta...

He never spoke another world, as a bullet zoomed through his head, killing him instantly. The Rebels noticed that they were surrounded. Zu looked around to see his comrades being slaughtered with both fighting moves and bullets. He unsheathed his sword.

Zu: Shadow! I'm gonna need your back up! Shadow?

Zu turned to see Shadow flying away.

Zu: Shadow?

Shadow, tears falling from his eyes: I'm... I'm sorry Zu.

Zu watched Shadow fly away. He then focused on the comrades being killed, and charged at the enemy. He was knocked away by a fire punch. He looked around, seeing that he was the last one of his team alive. He stuck his katana into the air.

Zu: ZAPDOS, GOD OF THE ELECTRIC POKEMON, GIVE ME YOUR POWER!

The clear starry night was suddenly filled with dark clouds, rumbling with pure power. A bolt of lightning that could shatter a mountain struck down upon Zu's katana, electrocuting him to the point that you could see his bones. He then fell to the ground.

Machop, leader of Fighting Dojo: The fool! Zapdos doesn't exist!

Zu rose from the ground, eyes dyed red instead of their normal white color.

Zu: May Zapdos forgive your stupidity.

Machop: Why not, he doesn't exist!

Zu, holding his katana: Scratch that. Have fun in hell!

Machop: HOW DARE YOU! I'M MORE OF A GOD THEN ZAPDOS! ATTACK MY FOLLOWERS!

The army of Hitmonchan, Hitmonlee, and Hitmontop charged at Zu.

Zu: Why must more blood be spilt?

Machop, laughing: The only blood that will be spilt will be yours!

Zu then charged at the army, Thundering bullets coming at him, and sliced a Hitmonchan in two, causing the pure electrical energy that had been absorbed into the blade to be released in the form of a giant curve of energy, obliterating a huge portion of the remaining forces to bloody chunks.

Machop: I've got 3 times more where that cam from, you can't win! ATTACK!

An army 3 times the size of the one Zu had obliterated appeared from the other side of the hill.

Zu: Ah shit! This is gonna hurt. ZAPDOS, LEND ME MORE OF YOUR POWER, SO THAT I MAY DESTROY THE NON-BELIEVERS!

Zu shoved his sword into the sky again. The dark clouds over the battle grew pitch black, and launched bolts of lighting the size of red woods around Zu. The bolts left the ground around Zu charred and black.

Machop, laughing: You missed! What kind of god do you have?

Zu, pointing up, eyes filled with hate: The kind that's gonna beat the living shit out of you!

Machop looked up and noticed a giant ball of lighting hovering above Zu.

Zu: Say your prayers.

Zu swung his katana, sending the ball of electricity rolling toward the army.

Machop, hiding in his trench coat: Shit!

The ball rolled over the army of fighting pokemon, killing them, and charring their bodies to mere ashes.

Zu, looking at the desolation: The weaklings. They didn't deserve to live!

Machop, coming out of his trench coat: YOU HAVEN'T WON YET!

Zu: Please, I'm on an entirely different level!

Machop, ripping of his trench coat: Then I'll just have to borrow some!

Machop was wearing a mechanical vest with a dial on it.

Zu: What the fuck is that?

Machop: It's my Rare Candy-Powered Vest! I've taken the essence of Rare Candies, and put that pure power into this vest!

Zu: That means...

Machop: Yes, I can change level at will! You will die here and now!

Machop the spun the dial.

Machop: LV. 70 will be enough! See you in hell!

Zu: If I ever make it there, I'll remember to say hi.

Machop, energy pulsing through him: VERY FUNNY!

Machop glowed in a bright white light and evolved into Machamp.

Zu: I CANNOT LET YOU LIVE, DEMON!

Zu charged at Machamp. He swung his katana at him, only to have it blocked. Machamp, using his other 2 arms, ripped the katana in half.

Machamp: Where are you without you precess "power" from Zapdos?

Zu: How cute. You thought Zapdos gave my katana his power!

Machamp: He couldn't give you his power! He doesn't exist! And even if he did, he couldn't hurt me, this vest is made of rubber, I'm fucking immortal!

Zu: If he doesn't exist, how come he's going to kill you?

Machamp: What? I just...

Zu then stabbed Machamp through the arms with the pieces of his katana.

Machamp: You katana won't work, my muscles are as strong fucking steel!

Zu: PI-KA-CHU!

A Thunder attack 1 million times stronger then anything a normal Pikachu should be able to produce came down from the heavens.

Machamp: Electric attacks won't work on me!

Zu: That's what my steel katana was for.

Machamp: Ah fuck!

The Thunder attack struck the steel katana, electrifying Machamp form the inside out, causing chunks of blood and gore to rain from the sky. Zu snapped his blade back into it's singular form and sheathed it. His eyes returned to their normal white color.

Zu, looking down at his hands which were dyed a bright red color: Oh my, it seems I have some repenting to do.

Meanwhile,...

Machamp's spirit rose from his splattered and charred body.

Machamp: Apparently there is a heaven. The bigger surprise is that I'm going there.

He then starred in awe at a giant lightning bird in front of him.

Zapdos: I don't exist, eh?

Machamp: Uh, about that...

Zapdos: Never mind. Groudon and Kyogre will have fun with you. In hell!

Machamp: Fuck!

Machamp immediately fell down from the sky, through the ground, and into the fiery pits of hell.

* * *

I'm just gonna say that this stroy will be updated **_SLOWLY_** as I would like to finish some of my other stories first, so enjoy this first chapter as a preview for the rest to come. Also, your reviews are apprecited. I like pie! Meeps! 


	2. Chapter 2

Matt here: I just wrote this so you readers would have something to do tomorrow while I take my birthday off. That's right, my B-day is October 12. FUCK YEAH! Also, REVIEW! YOU FUCKING MORONS! REVIEW! I like pie! Meeps!

* * *

Disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon. If I did I would be in jail for killing 4Kids for destroying my baby.

Cool of 190 Old Order/ Fall of 10 Freedom Era

It was a cool fall day. The battle 10 years ago had freed all pokemon. Zu, after wandering the planet for 3 years, had settled down and started a farm and a family. That is where our story picks up. Zu was out in the fields harvesting Oran berries when a black bird flew up to the door. It knocked. Zu's wife, pregnant, answered.

Zu's Wife: Hello, may I help you?

Black Bird: Hello, I wish to speak with your husband about an urgent matter.

Zu's Wife: May I ask how you know my husband?

Black Bird: We... served together.

Zu's Wife, surprised: My husband was in the army?

Black Bird: Oh, I'm sorry if I told you anything he didn't want you to know.

Zu's Wife: It's quite alright. He's outback in the fields. Do you wish for me to take you to him?

Black Bird, preparing for take off: No, I can find him on my own. Thank you, though.

Zu's Wife, watching the bird fly away: Wait, I never got your name.

Shadow, looking back: It's... Shadow.

Zu was taking a break from harvesting by resting on his basket. He wiped the sweat from his ears. He then noticed Shadow land next to him.

Shadow: Zu! My old friend! How long has it been?

Zu: You are no friend of mine.

Shadow, grinning: Oh come on. After all we've been through? I thought we had something special.

Zu, anger flowing through his veins: HOW DARE YOU COME HERE AND FUCKING PRETEND TO BE MY FRIEND? IT WAS YOUR FUCKING FAULT THEY DIED! WHY DON'T YOU JUST CRAWL INTO A HOLE AND FUCKING DIE?

Shadow, seriousness spreading over his face: I'm not here on personal business. They want you back.

Zu: NO! I'm not letting that anger take over me again! Go away and leave me alone!

Shadow: I can't.

Shadow moved up the feathers around his neck to reveal a Blast Seed collar around his neck.

Shadow: If I come back without you, fly for over 5 minutes, or leave the predetermined path, it blows up and I die.

Zu, looking at his daughter dancing around his pregnant wife: I'll come, but... to leave this all behind, for a traitor's life,... why?

Shadow, already walking: You could never let something die, pussy.

Zu: Your lucky about that, or I would leave to fucking die right now.

Shadow: Come on, we have to get to the army station before sundown.

Zu and Shadow walked along the path until the reached town. It was a town of square yellow buildings. There was a crowd of Magbys, Smoochums, and Elekids were playing together.

Zu, a tear coming to his eye: It's so beautiful.

Shadow: What, the noodle shop?

Zu: No, all of these different types of pokemon, living together.

Shadow: Yeah, it's nice,... on the surface.

Zu: I know, but the lie is better for the time.

Shadow: Come on, we're here.

Zu and Shadow were at the entrance of a square grey building with a sign with a triforce that had triangles that were colored red, blue, and green, the symbol of the rebellion, or the current government as I should say. Zu and Shadow entered to see a Skitty at the front desk filing her nails.

Skitty: How may I help you?

Shadow: Private Shadow and Civilian Zu, reporting for duty.

Skitty, looking at her chart: Yes, the doctor will see you in the back.

Shadow, bowing: Thank you.

Zu and Shadow walked down a hall filled with portraits of fallen pokemon.

Zu: Now this, is depressing.

Shadow: Yeah, just don't look at the wall coming up and you'll be fine.

Zu: Wh... oh god.

There was the portraits of the 49th division, Shadow and Zu's division.

Zu, hurrying his pace: Let us leave this place.

Shadow: Let's.

Zu and Shadow avoided the portraits and went into the back room. It was a white room with two chairs in it.

Shadow: I guess we sit down.

Zu and Shadow sat down just as the doctor walked in.

Doctor, a Kadabra: Ah, I've seen you've already sat down. Now let's see, you a Murkrow and a Pikachu.

The Doctor searched through a drawer.

Doctor: Uh,... here they are!

Zu: What?

The doctor pressed a button which caused metal braces to come out of the chairs, securing the two pokemon tightly to them.

Doctor: A Thunderstone for Pikachu, and a Night Band for Murkrow!

Shadow: WHAT? No one said anything about evolution!

Shadow then shot a night shade attack at both of the evolution-aiding items. The Night Band absorbed then energy and fell from the doctor's hand, but the Thunderstone exploded into tiny shard, releasing it's electric core, which immediately fled into the ground.

Zu, a look of fear on his face: WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?

Shadow: Saved you from evolving!

Zu: No! I mean you destroyed a Thunderstone! That will attract Raikou!

Doctor: Hahaha! Zu, you and your crazy religion. Raikou doesn't exist! He's a my...

At that exact second a dog-like creature burst though the ground under the doctor, ripping him in half, causing his blood to splatter all over the room.

Raikou, satanic tone: Who has my power?

Shadow: We don't have any! That was all there was!

Raikou, satanic tone: YOU LIE! I'LL RIP YOUR FUCKING MORTAL BODIES TO SHREDS IF I HAVE TO! RAIKOU!

Raikou launched a thunder attack, except that it came from underground. It would have killed them both, except that it blew up the chairs they were restrained to.

Zu, drawing his katana: I can not let you live!

Raikou, satanic tone: You dare challenge me, a god!

Zu: You are no god! You are a demon! And I will kill you like any other demon!

Raikou, satanic tone: You dare mock me! I will make your death slow and painful! But first, I will kill you comrade!

Raikou shot a lightning attack that zoomed in and out of the ground that struck Shadow, who fell down immediately.

Zu: Shadow!

Raikou then pounced on top of Zu, his fangs scratching his neck. He was about to finish it all when a murderous voice filled the room.

Groudon, bone-chilling tone: RAIKOU! LEAVE THIS WEAKLING ALONE! WE HAVE MORE PRESSING MATTERS TO ATTEND TO!

Raikou: But, master...

Groudon, bone-chilling tone: DID YOU JUST DISOBEY ME?

Raikou: No! I mean, I'm coming.

Raikou then disapeered in a flash of lightning, which destroyed the entire building.

Zu then looked over at Shadow's body and noticed his Blast Seed Collar had fallen off.

Zu, tears falling: At least you died a free pokemon.

Shadow, getting up: Who said I died?

Zu: How the fuck?

Shadow: It hit the Blast Seed Collar and shorted it out. Zapdos must like me.

Zu, happy: Yes, he must.

Shadow, noticing the lack of a building: Shit! We have to run!

Zu: Why? Raikou did it.

Shadow: You and me are the only ones who believe in Raikou! I only believed because I just saw him!

Zu: ... Fuck! Your right!

Shadow and Zu then tore off there sleeves, left them in the wreckage, and ran off into the woods to escape execution.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon, if I did this would already exist!

Zu and Shadow were walking along a path in the woods.

Shadow: That really fucking sucked! We're fugitives from the fucking army now!

Zu: Yeah, I hope my family is fine.

Shadow, noticing Zu's sadness: They'll be fine, the goverment had you listed a wandering samurai when I saw your report.

Zu: They have a report on me?

Shadow: Yeah! By the way, HOW THE FUCK DID YOU KILL THREE FUCKING ARMIES BY YOURSELF?

Zu: Zapdos's help.

Shadow: WHAT THE FUCK? He actually battled with you?

Zu: No! He gave me...

Zu's ears perked up, he heard a guitar strumming in the background.

Zu: It sounds so beautiful.

Shadow: I don't know why, but I think we should follow it.

Zu and Shadow followed the strumming of the guitar.

Zu: Dumm, dum, da, dum-dum. Dada dum, da dum.

Shadow: What are you doing Zu?

Zu: I don't know why, but I feel the music flowing through me.

Shadow: I know, it's like my heart is beating to the tempo.

Zu: I know.

The two never said another word after that as they walked down the path, the strumming growing louder and louder. The soon reached a clearing in the middle of the forest. There was a tree stump in the middle with a Jigglypuff sitting on it.

Zu, thinking: That seems normal.

Zapdos, his voice screaming inside: Zu! What the fuck are you thinking? Doesn't seem odd? Block out the music!

Zu: Put it's so soothing!

Zapdos: ARE YOU DEFYING ME?

Zu, snapping out of the trance: No sir!

Zu then noticed that there was something strange about the Jigglypuff. Insted of it's normal pink color, it was grey. It also had longer fangs sticking out of it's mouth and a set of tiny bat wings in it's back.

Zu: So it's a goth Jigglypuff, I don't see the big deal.

Zapdos: You haven't blocked out the melody, yet! Listen to the words or block out the music!

Zu: I can't get past the melody!

Zapdos: Then what do you have to do?

Zu: I don't... Of course!

Zu thn unsheathed his katana and took an Oran Berry out of his pocket, then sliced it in half, shoving the two pieces into his ears. He then noticed that Shadow was on the ground.

Zu: SHADOW!

Zapdos, inside Zu's head: Leave him, he's fine. Look at the Jigglypuff.

Zu's eyes then focused on the Jigglypuff, which he noticed was holding a black guitar, except it looked weird at the end.

Zu, thinking: I see! He's hypnotizing us with the music!

Zapdos, leaving Zu's head: Now you see, my son. (Note: Religious term, not actual son.)

Zu then focused his full attention at the Jigglypuff.

Zu, preparing to attack: Die you monster!

Jigglypuff: _You've broken my melodic curse, how can that have been?_

_I've practiced it for days, the answer can't be seen!_

Zu then stepped closer to the Jigglypuff.

Jigglypuff, getting nervous: _Wait. What are you doing, coming ever nearer._

_Eyeing my guitar, with not filled with fear-er._

_Ah! You broken the spell of... my Phantom... Lullaby!_

Zu, pointing at Shadow: Bring him back!

Jigglypuff: Sure, my spell's been broken, he's getting up now.

Shadow, rubbing his head: Why does my fucking head hurt?

Zu, pointing at the Jigglypuff: He tried to kill us!

Shadow, pulling out a kunie knife: He did, did he?

The pair of pokemon moved closer to the scared Jigglypuff.

Jigglypuff: Please! Don't hurt me! I'm just doing what he tells me too!

Shadow, holding Jigglypuff up by the neck: Who?

Jigglypuff: Groudon!

Zu then knocked the Jigglypuff out of Shadow's wings, and put his katana to his throat.

Zu: You work for Groudon!

Jigglypuff, crapping itself: Only so he'll take away my curse!

Zu, taking away his blade: What curse?

Jigglypuff: I was bitten by Count Golbat of Darkness Cave, I have to serve him as long as I'm a vampire!

Shadow: COUNT GOLBAT?

Zu: So, if we kill him, you no longer serve him, and you won't need to do Groudon's bidding?

Jigglypuff: I'll still be a vampire, but yeah.

Zu: Good! Off we go! By the way, what's your name?

Jigglypuff: It's... uh... Puffula. You sure you can kill him?

Zu: I kind of guessed that.

Zu and Puffula walked off into the direction of Darkness Cave.

Shadow, starting to cry: Count Golbat.

* * *

Vampire Jigglypuff. Isn't that enough for you to review? I like pie! Meeps! 


	4. Chapter 4

This is Puffula's song, that's right, I wrote it out! I had to cut it because it made the chapter too long for it's own importance to the main plot. I like pie! Meeps!

_

* * *

Come weary travelers, I'm right down the path._

_But if you should defy me, you will feel my wrath._

_I don't wish to hurt you, I just want to eat._

_You should be ready though, to bow before my feet._

_All with the power of... my Phantom... Lullaby._

_It lulls you down to sleep, then brings you to your knees._

_When you reach my presence, I do what I please._

_I stick my fangs inside you, and suck your soul out from within._

_Once you both have fallen, GROUNDON WILL SURELY WIN!_

_Now fall before the power of...my Phantom... Lullaby._

_You are getting closer, I can feel your power._

_When you are before me, your soul I shall devour._

_My melody entrants you, bringing you so near._

_Being in my presence, should fill you all with fear._

_Because of the sheer power of,...my Phantom... Lullaby._

_You almost there now, I'm just around the bend._

_My music has a power, from which you can't defend._

_It draws you ever closer, and let's you fall asleep_

_Once your eyes are closed though, you soul is what I keep._

_All through the power of... my Phantom... Lullaby._

_You are in my presence now, you seem to resist. _

_Your friend's already fallen, yet your existence you insist._

_Your stronger then most prey, with my melody I test._

_Your not the only one to do this, and you are not the best._

_How dare you resist the power of... my Phantom... Lullaby._

_Why don't you submit, to my awesome power?_

_So you can be drowsy, and your soul I can devour._

_Why won't you just submit? To my melody so sweet._

_Like the honey from a Beedrill, or the milk from Milktank's teat._

_All with the power of... my Phantom... Lullaby._

_How can you be resisting, all those demon verses?_

_Your soul is what I need, to undo Groudon's curses_

_They cause me great pain, and all the soul eating._

_Without a soul a week, my heart it will stop beating._

_The down side of the power of... my Phantom... Lullaby. _

_That blade will do you no good, I cannot be slain._

_By any mortal weapon, made on the mortal plain._

_What will a berry do, against my demonic power?_

_Are you just in denial, that this is your final hour!_

_Just submit to the power of... my Phantom... Lullaby._

_You've broken my melodic curse, how can that have been?_

_I've practiced it for days, the answer can't be seen!_

_Wait. What are you doing, coming ever nearer._

_Eyeing my guitar, with not filled with fear-er._

_Ah! You broken the spell of... my Phantom... Lullaby!_


	5. Chapter 5

Holy crap! I actually updated this story! Well enjoy. I like pie! Meeps!

* * *

Disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon, if I did Puffula would be one of Jigglypuff's evolutions. 

Zu and company were walking through the forest along a dirt path when a pair of Wild Hoothoots jumped out of their tree and started hooting. (Yeah, I gonna explain this now, Normal Pokemon are the humans of this universe and Wild Pokemon are the animals and are a bit smaller or bigger.)

Shadow, yawning: We've been walking for hours, can't we stop and make camp for the night.

Zu: Why? According to Puffula the next town is just 3 hours away?

Puffula: I don't know, Zu. Maybe we should just leave the weakling behind if he can't walk a measly 30 miles.

Shadow: Hey! I'm not the deadweight here! Your the reason we can't travel during the day!

Puffula, slightly confused: And why is that?

Shadow, also confused: I thought you were a vampire! Doesn't sunlight kill your kind?

Puffula: You believe that that mere sunlight is enough to turn me to dust? Your a complete idiot!

Shadow: Well... it takes one to know one!

Zu, slightly irritated: Will you two just stop it? I'm not gonna take three hours of this!

Shadow and Puffula, in unison: He started it.

Meanwhile, in the trees...

A Croconaw wearing a black bandanna and two Meowths weaing fingerless gloves where watching Zu and company from the branches. (I apologize for they're bad grammer havings.)

Croconaw: 'eh boyz, we finally gots us a group a suckas to rob.

Meowth #1: Yeah, theyz gonna be our targets, right Boss Crok?

Crok: Yes ya simpleton. Weez gonna rob 'em.

Meowth #2, hitting Swipez: Jeez Swipez! Whyz you gots ta bother the boss wit yur dump questions.

Swipez, hitting Snipez: Hey! Yur ta one bothren ta boss!

Crok: Both a you shut up! Here's the plan! Weez gonna run up ahead and destroy the bridge, forcin' them to make camp, and then we attack.

Snipez: Ya so smart boss!

Crok, leaping ahead: Shut ya trap and follow me!

Meanwhile,...

Shadow: Come on, Zu! We've been walking forever! Why can't we stop and camp for the night?

Zu: Come on! We've only got 2 hours to go!

Puffula: Maybe we should stop, it's getting close to midnight.

Zu, breathing heavily: No, we've just got 2 hours to go.

Shadow: Zu, why are you so set on getting there?

Zu, eyes watering: Why? Why? I left my wife with her thinking that I was going out for drinks with an old friend! What will she think when she sees our wanted posters? What will my daughter think?

Puffula: Dude, we can get to town, no problem. We just have to cross a bridge up ahead and the it's a straight shot out of the forest.

Zu, cheering up: Ok...

Meanwhile, up ahead at the bridge...

Swipez, standing on the bridge's edge: So boss, why ar we at tis heer bridge?

Crok: I'm gonna flood ta riva, so that tey have ta camp for ta night here.

Snipez, also on the edge: How ya gonna do tat boss?

Crok: Just hide in the trees an' watch.

The two Meowths ran up a tree and sat in the braches.

Crok, planting his feet down: Ok, watch this! CROC-O-NAW!

Crok the shot out a surf attack which flooded the river and washed away the bridge. He then walked over to the tree and climbed up to meet with his subordinates.

Swipez, eyes big: WOW, BOSS! Tat was amazin'!

Snipez, eyes also big: IT WAS!

Crok, smirking: That's why I'm the boss. Now shut up, here tey come!

Meanwhile, with Zu's group...

Puffula, up ahead a bit: The bridge is just up... ah fuck...

Zu, catching up: What's the ma...

The river had overflown it's banks by about 3 meters on the side they could see, and there was no trace that a bridge had even existed there.

Shadow, at the water's edge: What the fuck? I thought you said there was a bridge here?

Puffula: There was. Must have been some kind of freak storm.

Zu, quieting his voice: This was no storm, this was done by a water Pokemon.

Shadow, lowering his voice as well: How do you know?

Zu, pointing at the river: There is only about an inch of damp soil between the river and dry ground, since the river is over flowing it's boundaries that kind of preciseness could only be caused by a Pokemon's attack, most likely a surf, possibly a group of water guns.

Puffula, quiet voice as well: So what do we do?

Zu: We pretend like we're setting up camp for the night and wait for their move.

Shadow and Puffula: Ok.

Shadow, raising his voice: Oh darn, it looks like we can't cross the river. I guess we will have to camp here for the night.

The group proceeded to build a fire under a canopy made of sticks and leaves and lie down around it.

Zu: I guess I'll take first watch.

Puffula: Nonsense, I don't need as much sleep as you regular Pokemon, I'll stand guard

Zu, closing his eyes: If you say so.

Puffula got out his guitar, exited the canopy, sat down on a tree stump, and started practicing a new song.

Meanwhile, in the tree...

Swipez, nudging his boss: 'eh Boss, teys gone ta sleep!

Crok, getting up: Uh... what... oh right, get Snipez up.

Snipez, waking up: Huh, what's going on.

Crok, examining the camp: Hey,... one of them is awake!

Swipez: Yeah, he's standing guard. But he's a Jigglypuff an' all he gots is a guitar.

Crok: Good, if we can sneak up on him and knock him out, we can rob 'em no problem! Snipez, get 2 Shadow Balls ready for attack when we get close.

Snipez, paws glowing black: Got ya, Boss.

The group of Bandits jumped down out of the tree and slowly crept towards the camp until they were about a meter away from Puffula.

Crok, whispering: Snipez, now!

Snipez shot out a black sphere from his paw which went flying towards Puffula, who moved his head to the right at the last split-second, causing the ball to go flying into a tree.

Puffula: If you three don't mind, could you keep it down. My companions are trying to sleep, and they need their rest. So if you'd just leave peacefully...

Crok: Attack ya idiots!

Swipez and Snipez jumped out of the bushes claws armed.

Puffula, holding his guitar: Why do they never chose the peaceful option? ATTACK MODE A!

Puffula struck a loud A chord on his guitar, causing the neck to elongate and for two blades to pop out of the body, one on each side.

Puffula, both hands on the neck: Farewell.

He then swung the "Axe"(Double Entendre!) through both of the Meowths, slicing them in half, causing their blood and organs to splatter onto the ground. Crok starred in horror at his fallen comrade's mutilated corpses.

Puffula, noticing his expression: You like? Attack Mode A turns my Guitar into a Axe, and it's one of the only two transformations I can use without the moon's power, but it still does quiet nicely.

Puffula then began to twirl the Axe in his right hand.

Crok, sweating and shaking: Ya... ya... ya don't scare me!

Crok raised up his arms, summoning the surf he had flooded the river with behind him.

Crok, surf ready to go: I am Crok, The Water Bandit! I am king of the forest!

He then let loose the surf as Puffula swung his Axe, a line of darkness following in it's wake. The two attacks collided sending the water and guitar into the air.

Crok: There! Ya precious weapon is gone! Let's see me hurt me now!

Puffula, eyes reddening and fangs growing: You don't understand... that weapon wasn't to increase my kill rate...

Puffula suddenly appeared right behind Crok.

Puffula, whispering into Crok's ear: ... it was to handicap it.

Crok only had time to widen his eyes before Puffula sunk his fangs into his neck and drained every last drop of blood from him, leaving a withered husk on the ground.

Puffula then went and picked up his guitar, now back to normal,and threw the bodies into the now unflooded river, which washed them away. He then went back to his tree stump, sat down, and began practicing that new song again.

* * *

Yeah, you got to admit that was pretty fucking awesome. You should review and say how pretty fucking awesome you thought it was. I like pie! Meeps! 


	6. Chapter 6

Matt here: While I know this isn't my most popular series, I enjoy writing this. So if you want me to update my other stories you should review this, and if you hate my other stories, I think your a deucebag, but review anyway. I like pie! Meeps!

* * *

Disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon, if I did then Misty would be back... and Dawn would have bigger boobs... what? 

It was a sunny afternoon when the trio finally made it into town. Since the bridge had been destroyed it took a few more hours to get to the next one. They decided to go get a room at an inn, and Puffula, being tired from being out in the sun all day, chose to stay there and sleep. Zu and Shadow went off to the bar across the street to eat and get information. The waitress had just brought out their food and placed it on the table, and the two began to eat.

"Where should we begin our search?" asked Zu as he picked up a piece of meat with his chopsticks.

"Well, we should ask around town, I guess." stated Shadow, sipping his beer.

"We need to find out all we can about Darkness Cave before we get up there." commented Zu.

"You boys going to Darkness Cave?" asked a mysterious Houndoom on the stool next to them. "I believe I can help you."

"Why should we trust an old drunk like you?" said Shadow, now chugging his beer.

"Oh excuse me, I'm VanHellgar,..." responded the Houndoom, adjusting his hat. "...vampire hunter."

"And I am..." started Zu, before his eyes drifted to a wanted poster behind the Houndoom, with a 10-year old photo of him and his name in bold face print.

Shadow, catching his drift, said "We're Kage and At."

"Huh, did you know that your name is Shadow in English and his is Zu in German, that's kind of weird because there's a bounty poster right behind my head for the arrest of those exact same names." rambled VanHellgar, his paw sliding down to his gun holster.

"Huh,... that is really odd, I wonder if that SHADOW RUN!" yelled Zu as he grabbed his sword and jumped over the Houndoom, who had pulled out his gun and shot at Zu's seat. VanHellgar looked over at Shadow's seat to see it empty.

"Damn, there goes any chance of me paying for this meal." said VanHellgar as he rose from his seat and bolted out after them.

"Ok, here's your bill... damn it!" screamed the waitress as she arrived at VanHellgar's empty table.

Later, Zu and Shadow where crouched in an alleyway, hiding behind some trash cans.

"Do you think we lost him?" whispered Shadow, the brick wall up against his feathers.

Zu remained silent as he looked out into his sword's reflection to see the street.

"Zu, is it..." whispered Shadow, before Zu shoot him a glance basically meaning 'Shut the fuck up! He's right there!' .

"Excuse me, Miss. Have you seen a pikachu and a murkrow run by here?" questioned VanHellgar to a nearby Zubat.

"Hmm... why yes, I think I saw them go..." she managed to say before she was interrupted by a Poochyena running up to VanHellgar.

"Master! There's a vampire attacking the south side of town!" explained the Poochyena, breathing heavily. VanHellgar looked towards the ground and sighed.

"Damn it, I was so close. I guess your off the hook this time, Zu!" he yelled as he bolted towards the south side of town. Zu and Shadow stayed in their hiding place for a while until they were certain that he had left.

"Did that guy say a vampire was attacking?" asked Shadow with a hint of suspicion as the two were getting up.

"Yes, he did..." responded Zu, with an equal amount in his voice.

"You don't think..." said Shadow, his voice drifting off as the two looked at each other, and bolted off straight to the inn.

Meanwhile, in the south side of town...

A mass of corpses littered the streets, fires ignited the surrounding buildings, and a sea of blood surrounded and covered a small round body.

"Blood, blood, BLOOD! I NEED MORE BLOOD!" screamed the bloody mass of death as it ripped off the head of a screaming Kecleon and drank the blood that spewed from it. Suddenly, a gunshot went off and the round, bloody mass fell to the ground.

"Another one of the fucking things dead." commented VanHellgar as he placed his pistol back in it's holster.

Meanwhile, at the room at the inn...

The door came crashing open a Zu and Shadow forced their way in. The looked to see that none of the futons were out and the bathroom was empty.

"I do not believe that he is here, Shadow." said Zu.

"I knew we couldn't trust him! I say we get the hell out of here and the fuck away from that vampire/ bounty hunter!" yelled Shadow, a bit louder then he should have, considering the situation. A loud clunk came from the closet. Zu drew his blade and Shadow readied a kunai. The door jarred open.

Meanwhile, back to VanHellgar...

"What the fuck was it thinking? It's broad daylight. I swear, these fucking things are getting stupider every fucking day" commented VanHellgar, who spat on the body before turning around and walking the other way. As he walked away towards the nearest bar the sun began to set behind him. Darkness began to envelop the land, with the moon rising into the sky. VanHellgar suddenly turned his head just in time to avoid a _Shadow Ball_ to the back of the head. He turned around to see the mass in the middle of a whirlpool of blood being absorbed into it's body.

"Foolish Pokemon! You cannot even dare to stand against me!" yelled the vampire, moonlight gathering around him. "You shall feel my wrath!_HIDDEN POWER_!" The moonlight formed into a blood red, full moon behind the vampire's back and caused it to begin to glow dark red.

"This 'otta be fun!" yelled VanHellgar as he adjusted his hat.

--- END OF CHAPTER---

* * *

So, what'd you think about this chapter?... you are aware I can't hear you right?... are you some kind of retard? ... Just write a fucking review already! I like pie! Meeps! 


	7. Chapter 7

Matt here: I couldn't sleep because of this fucking cold, so I thought I write a chapter. Anyway enjoy. But don't forget to review at the end. I like pie! Meeps!

* * *

Disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon, if I did then I wouldn't be waiting to see the English version of the new movie. 

Shadow and Zu were in their hotel room when a thump was heard from the closet and the door jarred open. Shadow and Zu prepared to attack as Puffula rolled out.

"Hey guys, I was just taking a nap when I heard the door be kicked in." said Puffula as he got to his feet.

"Oh thank Zapdos, I thought you had gone on a murderous rampage." said Zu relieved as he sheathed his katana.

"Yeah, yeah, we can get all emotional later! In case you forgot, there is a bounty hunter chasing us!" yelled Shadow, still holding his kunai.

"You know, I don't really care for your attitude." said Puffula, picking up his guitar.

"You both can fight when we get out of town!" yelled Zu, stepping in between the two. They both starred angrily at each other for a few seconds, then relaxed. The trio then ran out of the inn and towards the town gate.

Meanwhile,...

VanHellgar was ducking behind an abandoned market stand, reloading his gun, as a gray colored mass drew closer, with a blood red circle floating on it's back.

"You can't hid forever! My _Hidden Power _let's me see blood, even through solid objects..." boasted the vampire, as he crept closer. "... I was fun while it lasted... Cle...FAIRY!"

A beam of light blue energy shot out of the moon on it's back and hit the stall, encasing it in ice.

"Hmm, I told him, no one can stand against me! I am Nosferatu Clephosh! I am immor..." yelled Clephosh, before a bullet went through his head.

"Shut the fuck up and die, you fucking abomination!" yelled VanHellgar, from behind the vampire.

Clephosh rose from the ground, the bullet hole in the back of his head healing itself.

"I should have known better than to expect the legendary VanHellgar to die by just one _Ice Beam_." commented the vampire, as the moon behind him glowed brighter. "CLEFAIRY!"

A beam shot at VanHellgar, missing him slightly and freezing the ground behind him. He responded by firing a few rounds into Clephosh, while dodging the _Ice Beams _that were being shot at him. He ducked behind a nearby pile of dried corpses and reloaded his gun.

'Damn thing, I wasted all of my bullets on it. I got six shots left, better make'em count.' thought VanHellgar, as he jumped away as the bodies froze together as an _Ice Beam _hit them.

"When will you learn? Bullets can't harm me! You should just lay down and let me turn you into my slave!" yelled Clephosh as the blood red moon floating behind him glowed brighter.

"Then how about you taste my _Ember_! Houn-DOOM!" yelled VanHellgar as an orange glow traveled from his mouth, down his arm, and into his gun, from which he fired off five shots from it quick succession. The flaming bullets zoomed towards Clephosh, when a a globe of snow and ice swirled up around him, shielding him from the bullets. As the snow and ice cleared, Clephosh saw VanHellgar standing in the spot he had fired from.

"How did you like my _Blizzard_? Now, will you just submit and become my..." said Clephosh, until a gun smacked him in the back of the head, sending him to the ground. He looked to see that VanHellgar was still standing in his same spot.

"You been allowed life for much too long, scum! Now for you to die!" yelled VanHellgar, the voice coming from behind him.

"But... how..." stuttered Clephosh, as he laid on the ground looking at VanHellgar, who suddenly turned into a Teddiursa plushie. "Ah..._Substitution_."

"That's right, bitch! Now for the lonely thing to kill your kind for certain,_Solar Beam_!" said VanHellgar, placing the gun's barrel up against the vampires head. "HOUNDOOM!"

A green glow then moved from his mouth, down his arm, and into his gun, which he fired causing a blindingly shining bullet to fly out and bury it self into Clephosh's head. His head then exploded, sending blood and brain matter all over VanHellgar.

"Another one of those fucking things out of the world." commented VanHellgar as he brushed off most of the bloody chucks off of himself, after which he walked over to the Teddiursa plushie and picked it up after placing a hat on it matching his own. "Come on, Mr.Snuggles, we have some fugitives to track down."

He then preceded to place Mr.Snuggles in the side pocket of his satchel, and placed his gun in it's holster. He was going to track down Zu and Shadow, but he was going to get ammo first.

Meanwhile, at the West Town Gate...

Zu, Shadow, and Puffula were in front of the giant wooden gate that blocked the town's western exit. As they stood a Whismur walked over to them, wearing a green vest with a nametag that was blank.

"Excuse me, may I assist you?" asked the polite Whismur.

"Why yes, we would like to exit town." responded Zu. "So could you please open the gate?"

"Open the gate?" questioned the Whismur, confused at his ignorance. "We can't do that. The city is in a level 5 vampire attack, this gate is not opened for anyone."

"Oh, then I am sorry for troubling you." answered Zu as he turned to his companions. "It appears we cannot exit."

"Well, we have too! We sitting Wingulls if we stay in the city." whispered Shadow, his nervousness showing.

"Don't worry, I know how to handle her type." whispered Puffula.

He proceeded to walk over towards the Whismur and the began to talk. After a few seconds, she began to blush wildly and soon Puffula came walking back.

"So, can we get through?" asked Shadow, eager to hear good news.

"Not at all,..." responded Puffula, which caused Shadow to attempt to strangle him as Zu held him back. "so we do this the old-fashioned way."

"Which is?" asked an angry Shadow.

"This!" yelled Puffula as he pulled out his guitar. "ATTACK MODE A!"

Puffula then struck a long A cord on his guitar, causing the neck to elongate and two blades to pop out, one on each side. He then jumped and smashed his "Axe" into the gate, creating a moderate-sized hole. The three then climbed through the hole and ran off into the night.

Meanwhile, on another plane of existence...

Clephosh's ghost was rising into the sky from his dismembered rotting corpse.

"Huh, so this is death... I always figured there'd be more Marowaks in black cloaks." commented Clephosh as he ascended into the sky.

Suddenly, a huge geyser of lava erupted from the ground below and stopped in front of the Clefairy. It formed to resemble the face of Groudon.

"**Hello puny mortal! How would you like a second chance at life? A chance for revenge on all who have wronged you. All I need is for you to do something for me.**" said the face in the lava, in a satanic tone.

"Depends, what do you want?" asked Clephosh, curios to the prospect of a second life.

"**I want you to kill a samurai Pikachu that goes by the name Zu.**" stated the molten face.

"Why? What's he done to you?" questioned Clephosh, who's curiosity was getting the better of him.

"**It's not what he's done, it's what he's going to do!**" shouted the lava face, who's patience was wearing thin.

"Ok, I get sent back, kill the samurai, and then live the rest of my new life. Gotcha." obeyed the Clefairy.

"**Good, now you will appear in your master's cave with your body healed.**" said the lava, after which Clephosh disappeared in a flash of light and all that remained of his body was the blood that had dried around his outline.

---End of Chapter---

* * *

So, what'd you think? Maybe I should make Mr.Snuggles a main character? Huh? Would you like that? What evs. I like pie! Meeps! 


End file.
